As I've previously mentioned the Olympic Closing Ceremony was inspired by the concept of an iPod on constant shuffle. Therefore it is difficult to divide neatly into acts.
However the introduction featured "Emile Sande" off of the opening ceremony who we later learned would play a big part in the closing ceremony. Really her main problem is that her debut single "Heaven" didn't go straight to number 1 to calm Britain after the August 6th 2011 (6/8/11) riots. After she'd sung the first few bars of her second single "Read All About It" the camera panned back to reveal a stage depicting the streets of London displayed in the form of the Union (Jack) Flag (St Georges Cross overlayed with a St Andrews Cross on a newspaper coloured background). Around these streets tore newspaper covered cars including the series 1 mini designed to remind us of the 1960's and Italian cool. The chaos and noise was designed to remind us of the chaos that the Olympics coming to London had caused. Then "Timothy Spall" appeared dressed as "Winston Churchill" from the top of the 'Big Ben' clock tower model in the centre of the stage and recited those lines from "William Shakespeare's" "The Tempest" that you remember from the opening ceremony. It turns out this was just a way of introducing our British Royal hosts for the evening (Prince Harry and Catherine Duchess of Cambridge). Once they'd taken their seats we launched into a version of the British national anthem "God Save the Queen" unusually begun by a chorus of that such a London sound - workmen digging up the road with their pneumatic drills.
Once the British national anthem had finished we were treated to 1980's Ska band "Madness" being driven around the stadium on the back of a flat-bed truck while singing "Our House" the hit they also performed at the Diamond Jubilee Concert. They were quickly followed by other flat-bed trucks that resembled floats at London's famous "Notting Hill Carnival." As the Notting Hill Carnival is predominately a West Indian (black) affair it was at this point things got a bit rowdy and middle England got scared. Fortunately the music quickly changed to "Blur's" song "Parklife" as preformed by the band of the British Army Guards regiments stationed at near-by "Wellington Barracks" and a Church of England Protestant Vicar appeared to calm things down. This sequence showed the otherside of 1960's Britain which featured large numbers of West Indian migrants arriving including that first batch who arrived on the "HMS Windrush."
Time then suddenly jumped forward and we were treated to 1980's (gay, so gay) Disco act "The Pet Shop Boys" performing their hit "West End Girls" aboard garishly orange rickshaws like you find all over Covent Garden. Then the show really gave up as allegedly famous boy-band "One Direction" off of the X-Factor were allowed to whore one of their 'hits' around the stadium on the back of yet another flat-bed truck. It was at this point I may have wandered off and taken a cigarette break.
As if to give "One Direction" the hint that their time was up performers from the West End Show "Stomp" hammered away on dustbins and other assorted metal work. Now this could have been a way to promote the West End (theatre district) version of "Stomp" but I prefer to think of it as a way to sell infamous London anti-capitalist samba drummers "Rhythms of Resistance" to a wider audience. Either way they quickly made way for that unholy cacophony of noise known as "The Beatles" song "A Day in the Life." As the Beatles are now mostly dead this song was performed to the sight of "Britain's Got Talent" winners "Spellbound" doing some painfully redundant modern dance routine. Then a London Black Taxi delivered former front man of "The Kinks" "Ray Davies" to the stage. The Kinks are of course most famous for that CIA baiting song "Lola" or "Sunny Afternoon" the protest song against the almost 90% higher rate of income tax pursued by Britain's Labour Government in the 1970's. However surrounded by what can only be described as overgrown Oompa Loompa's Davies chose to play "Waterloo Sunset" while trying not to look like "Take That's" "Gary Barlow" who despite losing a baby earlier in the week is a notorious ally of Britain's Conservative Party and spokesman against the current 50% higher rate of income tax.
Then that Emelie Sande women turned up again and 'sung' the full version of "Read All About It" while a montage of great moments from the 2012 Olympics played on the big screens. This was of course a reference to her controversial 7/7 terrorist bombings in the opening ceremony. However you've really got to watch those montages because I swear that just as Ms Sande launched into one of the rises of "We can r-r-r-r-ead all about it" the big screen flashed up an image of the Chinese Olympic team. Well at least she's got her career in microbiology to fall back on I suppose.
The ceremony then moved on to the parade of nations. In a break from tradition rather then parading around behind their national flags the athletes casually wandered in through the crowds to take up their place in the mosh pit(s) next to the stage. As they entered a British band called "Elbow" played one of their hits. "Elbow" were quite a famous band in the late 1990's/early 2000's. Unfortunately since then the lead singer has got really fat. I considered this 'Fat Elbow' to be a warning to the athletes in the mosh pits not to get too excited because with all those field and weightlifting competitors knocking around those mosh pits could really have turned into their founding acronym - March Of the Skin Heads (MOSH). Fortunately the organisers decided to calm things down with a (ripped off) Cirque Du Soleil inspired stage show and a recording of "Kate Bush" "Running up that Hill" playing in the background. The centre piece of the stage was an Egyptian style pyramid but this was simply a reference to the trend within western pop-music towards Egypt rather then anything in particular.
There then followed a medal ceremony for the winners of the men's Olympic Marathon and a ceremony to mark the achievement of all the volunteers who made the games possible.
We were then welcomed back to the performance by the opening bars of "Queen's" "Bohemian Rhapsody" while the clever LED's built into every seat in the Olympic Stadium fired off an artists impression of what the music would have looked like if they were displayed on a graphic equalisers. Obviously being able to sequence that many LED's to the music is something of a technical achievement but is hardly considered cutting edge these days Unfortunately rather then being allowed to listen to "Bohemian Rhapsody" we were forced to endure a deaf show choir (think Glee) miming along to "John Lennon's" "Imagine" while stage hands built a face on the stage. It turned out to be John Lennon's face in the end but it really reminded me of that Gary Sinise movie where the executive producer of "CSI:NY" discovers a giant human face on Mars. A clear reference the the current NASA "Curiosity" mission.
The purpose of getting all the athletes to stand in mosh pits throughout the closing ceremony was to put them under the extra pressure of being broadcast live to a global TV audience while being exposed to the sensory overload that was stage show. If you thought it was weird watching it on TV up close it was a disorientating mix of loud noises, bright flashing lights and lots of smoke. It's not actually that different to the enhanced interrogation techniques used in places like Guantanamo Bay.
The first part of this sensory assault was "George Micheal" from the 1980's pop-band "Wham" and a subsequent solo career. Although "George Micheal" is clearly past his best he performed one of his hits "Freedom" and a new song which I think he wrote about his near death experience which saw him rushed to hospital with pneumonia in the latter part of 2011. As "George Micheal" is gay and has a reputation for engaging in risky sexual activity the thing that everybody thought but no-one said when he was taken ill was that his HIV had progressed into full blown AIDS. Throughout both songs "George Micheal" was backed by a black soul choir similar to those you find in Pentecostalist Churches across sub-Saharan Africa. Sub-Saharan Africa has a huge HIV/AIDS problem and very negative attitudes towards homosexuality. Therefore the sight of a gay man who is nowhere near as good as he used to be and possibly be about to die from AIDS seemed to be designed to reinforce the widely held belief in sub-Saharan Africa that AIDS is God's punishment for homosexuality. Of course this has a knock on effect of increasing the stigma around HIV/AIDS in sub-Saharan Africa which discourages people from getting tested and seeking treatment thus increasing the number of people who die of HIV/AIDS. "George Micheal" was immediately followed by modern British band "The Kaiser Chiefs" playing "Pinball Wizard" by 1960's British band "The Who." Of course the "Kaiser Chiefs" took their name from a South African soccer team so their performance was another link to the sub-Saharan HIV/AIDS debate which was a recurring theme of the ceremony. Throughout "George Micheal's" performance the LED's formed the shape of a piano keyboard which was a reference to the "Paul McCartney" of "The Beatles" and "Stevie Wonder" song "Ebony & Ivory" that toe curling call for racial unity.
The next sequence began with a video medley of hits by British pop-star "David Bowie" before breaking into a full version of the Bowie hit "Fashion." This heralded the start of the much hyped 'model's parade.' which began with something of a tease. Rather then a parade of beautiful people appearing trucks displaying billboard sized photographs of a famous British models such as "Kate Moss," "Naomi Campbell," "Lily Cole," "Georgina May Jagger" (daughter of "Rolling Stones" frontman "Mick Jagger") and "Sophie Dahl" (granddaughter of famous British author "Roald Dahl") paraded around the stadium. Then suddenly the photographs were ripped away revealing the actual models who proceeded to strut around the stage wearing dresses by top British designers such Alexander McQueen. The idea was to promote Britain's fashion industry which has been suffering during the recession.
Once the models had left the stage "Annie Lennox" of 1980's British band "The Eurythmics" and a solo career appeared carried aboard Gothic pirate/sailing ship wearing a very Gothic costume. The goth theme was draw attention to the "goth" subculture and by extension Britain's various counter-cultures. It is at this point that I have to declare a personal interest in the proceedings. Without trying to name drop or show off I've actually met many of the performers in the ceremony in passing, through mutual friends or having worked on the same projects as them especially on things like charity appeals for developing nations. Therefore performing at the closing ceremony of an Olympics that has focused so heavily on me would be particularly stressful for them. "Annie Lennox" is one of those people because she has worked tirelessly in the fight against HIV/AIDS in Africa and with charities such as "Live Aid" and "Live 8." Therefore her inclusion was to continue the HIV/AIDS theme.
Next up was current British pop-star "Ed Sheeran" performing a cover version of legendary British band "Pink Floyd's" song "Wish You Were Here" while a tightrope walker performed on a high wire above the stadium. "Pink Floyd" of course famously re-formed for the "Live 8" so along with "Annie Lennox" and "Paul McCartney's" performance of "Hey Jude" in the opening ceremony this was designed draw focus onto the "Live 8" concert which might not have strictly speaking been done with the permission of the British establishment. "Ed Sheeran" did not take part in Live 8 and is just another one of those wastrels from Croydon's "BRITS School of Performing Arts." Probably two of his most famous songs are "The A-Team" which is about a women forced into prostitution following addiction to hard drugs (crack cocaine, heroin etc) and "Small Bump" which is about the trauma of losing a baby to miscarriage. The only problem is that neither of these experiences have occurred in "Ed Sheeran's" life so he's simply making it all up to cynically exploit the emotions of people who have gone through those experiences for monetary gain. His current single is a duet with a British hip-hop/grime artist "Devlin" in which they both murder "Bod Dylan" and "Jimi Hendrix's" great hit "All Along the Watch Tower" so it's was appropriate he destroyed yet another great song at the Olympic closing ceremony. Unfortunately though I think his inclusion was to promote Britain's creative industries such as the "BRIT school" system of churning out a procession of bland a mediocre pop-stars.
The 1960's psychedelia of "Pink Floyd" was followed by more of the same as "Russell Brand" appeared on top of a generic 1960's Hippy bus as lines from British author "Roald Dahl's" novel "Charlie and the Chocolate factory." were recited. The 1974 film of the novel; "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory" is of course absolutely packed with references to illegal drugs. "Russell Brand" then went on to sing British band "The Beatles" psychedelic hit "I am the Walrus" which of course contains the lyric; "I am the Eggman." As with quite a few other lazy people my Twitter avatar is just an egg. All these psychedelic sounds and swirls of colour would have been very disorientating to anyone in the athletes mosh pits or anyone who'd taken too much LSD at any point in their lives. The presence of "Russell Brand" standing on top of a bus/van whilst shouting through a megaphone had a specific resonance with me because I've actually met "Russell Brand" quite a few times before (and after) he became famous. One of the incidents from his wilder days that he's talked about was that occasion on I think the 2002 Mayday protests in the Soho district of London where he got arrested after climbing onto the roof of a TV satellite van and removing his trousers. I was one of the people that the police had to go through to get to Mr Brand but while he's gone on to a movie career and a pop-star (ex)wife all I got to remember the day was some strange riot shield shaped scars on the back of my head. Therefore if you were being mean I suppose you could call him a 'sell-out' by comparison and I suspect he's still smarting from some comments I may have made about his divorce from "Katy Perry." The "Russell Brand" performance was accompanied by a classical string quartet called "Bond." Apart from sharing a surname with fictional super-spy "James Bond" "Bond" the band were ill-judged experiment from the early 2000's by music producer "Mike Batt" who was famous for putting together "The Wombles" musical act based on the 1970's British TV show of the same name. The idea was to make classical music popular with fans of pop music by putting the four girls in the band in sexy clothes and doing dance tinged remixes of classical hits. Although according to Wikipedia they sold over 4 million records worldwide the experiment failed and "Bond's" appearance at the Olympic closing ceremony was met by a chorus "Oh, I thought they were dead" from the audience.
As he left the stage "Russell Brand" introduced world famous British DJ and Brighton's (Hove actually) most famous resident "Fatboy Slim." Although I think that the closest that I've ever come to meeting "Fatboy Slim" was being in the same city as he was doing his big (250,000+) gig on Brighton beach in 2002 Brighton is a very small place where everybody knows everybody elses business so even though I've been out of circulation for getting on for seven years I'm pretty sure I could get in touch with him by making a couple of phone-calls. "Fatboy Slim" performed for a platform inside inside a giant inflatable octopus. At the time this was simply a reference to the fact he lives by the seaside but would pick up an extra significance during the next act.
This began with "Jessie J" - another BRIT school wastrel - singing her second single "Price-tag" while being driven around a golden set in a USD450,000 Rolls Royce (Roller) car which was a great advert for Rolls Royce. The single "Price-tag" is of course synonymous with the practice of 'Price-tagging' which Jewish settlers engage in to force Palestinians off their lands and to some extent the 2011 Libya war. Although we've never met "Jessie J" and I are not great fans of each other. In fact you could argue that the incident that I had in a Brighton pub during the Spain V France Euro2012 quarter-final and the "Hackney 1 Big Weekend" on June 23rd (23/6/12) was set up specifically to mock lines from "Jessie J's" first single "Do it like a Dude." In an effort to show that British hip-hop acts are just as good as hip-hop acts from the USA "Jessie J" was joined on stage by "Tinie Tempah" and "Tiao Cruz" to sing the parts of "Price-tag" that were sung by USA hip-hop star "B.O.B" on the recorded version The ostentatious displays of wealth around the stage particularly the advert for Rolls Royce were specifically aimed at China's newly rich who are highly valued by luxury goods exporters because while they're learning how to cope with their new found wealth after generations of poverty they will buy any old cr*p. The Gulf Monarchies that the adverts were also aimed at have of course been super-rich for generations even if they still haven't developed any taste. China's newly rich are a key demographic in the USA V China struggle for global dominance. Through things like the "Coldplay & Rhianna" song "Princess of China" which loses a lot of subtly in translation Britain in particular has been encouraging this demographic to push for faster reforms to China's Communist system however I doubt the Brits are doing this because they want to help the Chinese people. Bathed in golden light "Fatboy Slim's" inflatable Octopus suddenly became a reference to the "Octopus Con" which I mentioned on the night. This is quite a famous con that changes from victim to victim but the basic principle is that there is this shadow cabal or secret society that has it's tentacles in every aspect of global society and secretly controls the world by doing things like selling US government bonds on a secret shadow market. All the victim has to do is give the conman their life savings and the conman will allow them access to this secret bond market and they will make billions. One victim of this con was an American hedge-fund manager called "Samuel Israel" who's story appeared in the British newspaper "The Mail on Sunday" magazine that very morning. Therefore the reference to the "Octopus con" was to enquire which of our Olympic visitors were aware of the "Mail on Sunday" while making me and the editorial staff at the "Mail on Sunday" a bit paranoid. The central principles of the "Octopus con" are of course the basis to all those nutty conspiracy theories about 9/11, the Zionist Occupation Government (ZOG), the Freemasons, the Bilderbergs, the New World Order (NWO) etc. Therefore the reference to the 'Octopus con' was designed was to encourage the conspiracy theorists to believe in the conspiracy which is particularly popular amongst neo-Nazi's in the USA and discuss it. "Tinie Tempah" and "Jessie J" then went onto sing "Tinie Tempah's" hit "Written in the Stars" before "Tiao Cruz joined in and all three sung "You Should be Dancing" by (technically) British band "The Bee Gees.
Next up was one of the most widely plugged events of the evening - the reunion of 1990's British pop band "The Spice Girls." I actually missed most of this performance because I was too busy trying to write a post on my Blackberry's tiny, tiny keypad. The purpose of this was to remind everybody of the 1990's and promote discussion about 'Girl Power' the type of soft-feminism that the "Spice Girls" promoted during their career. At an Olympics that had already been dubbed 'the women's Olympics' and featured all nations including Saudi Arabia and Qatar putting forward female athletes for the first time alongside such things as the discussion about black women being accepted in the USA's political/intelligence establishment feminism and female empowerment was a major theme of the 2012 games. It also gave me another opportunity to show off because back in 2005 when the Brits 'rescued' me and my friends from the disasterous lives we were living down in Brighton a friend of mine was renting a room in an apartment complex where "Emma 'Baby Spice' Bunton" also lived. So while to you she's a world famous celebrity to me she's just another one of those people I sometimes passed in the corridor while pretending not to be as drunk as I clearly was. Remember this detail it will come in useful later.
The "Spice Girls" were followed by 1990's British band "Oasis'" frontman "Liam Gallagher" playing one of "Oasis'" biggest hits "Wonderwall" with his new band "Beady Eye." This was again an attempt to remind people of the 1990's and the 'Cool Britanina' fad that saw "Tony Blair" and the Labour Party swept into political office in 1997. "Oasis''" great musical rivals the British band "Blur" were of course playing a simultanious concert in Hyde Park. This of course was very bad news for anyone who can remember bands like "Oasis" and "Blur" because it means that they're now so old the happy days of their youth now counts as nostalgia.
After "Oasis/Beady Eye" chronology took a little detour and we were taken back to the 1970's as the public address system played a recording of British 'prog-rock' band the "Electric Light Orchestra (ELO)" song "Mister Blue Sky." 'Prog-rock is of course what happened when 1960's pyschedelia got too weird. "Mr Blue Sky" is also something of an anthem of Britain's Conservative Party whose chosen political colour is blue. Therefore this section of the closing ceremony was a reference to the 2009 Conservative Party conference just before they were returned to power in May 2010. While the music was playing the stage was filled by actors dressed as what can only be described as spectators and performers at a 1920's circus. The sequence featured women in 1920's dress who were a reference to "The Suffragettes" helping to load a man dressed as a sort of 1920's flight suit which was a reference to the birth of flight into a circus cannon.
This sequence was interrupted by British comedian "Eric Idle" of "Monty Python" fame signing the signiture song from the film "The Life of Brian" - "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life." "Eric Idle's" performance looked a lot like a scene from the "Monty Python" themed West End (London's theatre district) musical "Spamalot" and all the perfomers (such as the roller-blading nuns) and stage sets were clearly borrowed from a number of West End shows making the performance an advert for London's theatre district. Eventually "Eric Idle" was joined on stage by a troupe of Indian (Bollywood style) dancers. This was designed to highlight Britain's close relationship with former colony and emerging global power India however this relationship might well be under review because Britain has been giving India a lot of bad advice recentely. The relationship between Britain and India was tested earlier in the week when in response to a question about sport provision in schools the British Prime Minister "David Cameron" said that he wanted to do away with Indian dancing. This caused a minor political storm with accusations of racism. The performance of Indian dancers though made it look like "David Cameron" was only giving a cheeky little hint about what the closing ceremony held and those who disagree with him clearly aren't as clever as his is. The sequence ended with the man in the 1920's flight suit being fired out of the circus cannon and being caught in a giant safety net. This was a reference to Britain's great 'social safety net' the Welfare State and another reference to how the Brits had rescued me. That last point would have carried more weight if it hadn't been proceeded by the "Spice Girls" performance.
World famouse British rock band "Muse" then performed the single they'd written as the theme to the Olympic games "Survival." This though was mainly just an opportunity to clear the stage for the next sequence.
The reason why the stage hands needed time to set up the next sequence was that it featured a giant TV screen showing "Freddie Mercury" the legendary British/Indian frontman of the British band "Queen" working the crowd at one of his gigs. Some think this footage was taken from "Queen's" performance at the 1984 "Live Aid" concert while others thought it was from their 1985 "Rock in Rio" concert while others though it came from the 1986 Wembley stadium concert. In truth the footage had been so extensively digitally enhanced that parts of it were probably taken from all three concerts while others were totally computer generated. Apart from providing an advert for Britain's computer design/creative industries this was also reminiscent to "Hatsune Miku" a Japanese popstar who exists only as a computer generated hologram. As such it wasn't a particularly good advert from Britain's computer design/creative industries making the sales pitch something along the lines of "We'll charge you top rates for a fourth rate service." "Freddie Mecury" did of course famously die of AIDS related illness and unlike "George Micheal" died in his prime meaning that he is still widely respected across the world even in places like Rio de Janerio which will host the 2016 Olympics. So the inclusion of "Freddie Mercury" was to continue the HIV/AIDS theme but to present it as a bad thing to the Brazilian audience rather then a good thing which is how it was presented to the African audience. Attention turned away from the big screen as two of the surviving members of "Queen" "Brian May" and "Roger Taylor" played one of the band's songs "Brighton Rock" which is again a reference to the British seaside town where I used to live. They were then joined on stage by "Jessie J" to perform the classic Queen hit "We Will Rock You" which had become something of an anthem for the 2012 games being played at almost every venue during almost every event. It was also what the British organisers had hoped that the 2012 games would do to me. After all in most of the photographs the police have of me I do quite literally have blood on my face.
The performance of "We Will Rock You" was followed by the flag ceremony which is a set part of any Olympic closing ceremony which sees the Olympic Hymn being sung and the Olympic flag being lowered and then passed to a representative of the next country to host the Olympic games. On this occasion the British hosts chose to have the Olympic Hymn sung by a Welsh Male Voice Choir. This obviously has some reference to me, my grandmother and our Welsh roots. It's mainly though that a Welsh Male Voice Choir in full voice is a force to be reckoned with.
Following the flag ceremony Brazil took charge of the closing ceremony for a short sequence showcasing their nation's heritage and Olympic vision. As the next hosts of the Olympics Brazil was forced to work very closely with Britain throughout the 2012 games this little sequence also provided them with an opportunity to provide their response to some of the issues raised. Therefore I deliberately went a bit hazy during this bit. However I think the sight of a roadsweeper being told off for dancing by a security guard was a hint that the 2016 games would be much less oppressive then the 2012 games. I think the sexy music of the carnival was a response to the HIV/AIDS and a warning about the British backpackers, gap year hoorays and sex tourists who visit Brazil every year before getting over-excited and engaging in risky and down right illegal sexual activity. Then "Pele" appeared. Although he may have played a bit of football in his youth "Pele" is probably most famous as a spokesman for erectile disfunction and drugs like Viagra. So Brazil's contribution to the HIV/AIDS debate was that they were not so much worried about the Brazilian population as the British visitors, provided they could get it up. Mind you I was quite wasted at that point so I might have just made that all up.
Brazil's segment was followed by the extingushing of the Olympic cauldron and the compulsary speeches which were so boring I didn't really listen. However I think IOC head "Jacques Rogge" simply tried to say his peice amid the overall weirdness of the ceremony. LOCOG head "Sebastian Coe" was looking deliberately scholarly as he peered over his glasses giving the whole thing the air of a university graduation ceremony. Apart from being a reference to Britain's changes to university education (fee increases, riots, etc) this was a reference to Britain's attempts such as "Bond" to get it's population more interested in high culture and get over their short attention spans. The joke being that if people managed to stay watching during the really boring bit they would be rewarded by a nice surprise. That surprise came in the form of a performance by British pop band from the 1990's "Take That" which would have got women of a certain age really excited. Apart from a bit more 1990's nostalgia "Take That's" performance was really just a distraction so the Olympic cauldron could collapse back to it's bonfire state and the stage could be set up for the next sequence.
It was in this next sequence where things really got strange. A sculpture of a giant red bird starting moving above the stage while dancers from the high culture Royal National Ballet performed a routine which featured famous British ballet dancer "Darcey Bussell" being lowered from the roof on a zip-wire wearing flaming wings. Officially the giant red bird was the mythological "Pheonix" and was supposed to symbolise Britain rising from the ashes of it's economic troubles but also looked a lot like the Eagle symbol used by Nazi Germany's "Waffen SS" or an Eagle symbol that is used by a lot of Native American tribes such as the Navaho. The image of the 'Firefly bonfire' from the opening ceremony along with all the ballet again made me think of the actress "Summer Glau" who Britain had sort of painted a target on for the 2012 games. One possible reason they could have done that was in the hope that it would trigger a guilt response in me and as far as the Brits are concerned guilt over poor behaviour is considered a weakness.
The obsession with US TV Shows continued in the next sequence with 1960's British band and "Live 8" participents "The Who" performing a medley of their songs. The first song they played was "Baba O'Reilly" which is of course used as the theme music to "CSI:NY" which is produced by "Gary Sinise" who was referenced in the "John Lennon" face on Mars sequence just in case anyone didn't get the hint about the Mars Curiosity rover. "The Who" went on to play "See Me, Feel Me" and "My Generation" which of course was different from their Superbowl performance when they just played the three songs used as the theme music to the three CSI TV Shows in an effort to promote the CSI:Trilogy that was shown on US TV shortly afterwards.
The ceremony closed with Emile Sande again singing a cover version of "John Lennon's" song "Imagine" which was used earlier in the ceremony. Considering Ms Sande's disappointment at her first single "Heaven" not getting to number 1 after the August 2011 riots the opening line "Imagine there's no heaven." must have been particularly cutting.
Tuesday, 28 August 2012
The Olympic Opening Ceremony.
Originally titled "Don't Mention the War." on 28/7/12 and edited multiple times since.
Like the games itself the opening ceremony was overwhelmed by war, nationalism and whoring. However I think the artistic director Danny Boyle coped well by setting out to tell the history of Britain from the start of the industrial revolution to the present day.
Taking a major historical liberty act 1 began with the start of the industrial revolution set at the start of the 1900's (20th Century). It started showing Britain's agricultural economy (our green and pleasant land) being ravaged by resource mining and the smoke stacks of industrial development. The key figure here was Kenneth Branagh playing Isambard Kingdom Brunel/generic 19th century industrialist. He recited lines from William Shakespeare's "The Tempest" which is a play about a man trapped on an island with a wizard who could control the weather. The management thought this would play well in African nations where witchcraft is still respected as a legitimate belief system. However what everybody in the cast, audience or anyone with at least some knowledge of science saw was a commentary about how the carbon dioxide released by burning coal causes climate change. A clear and only slightly justified swipe at China over climate change negotiations. Then suddenly the scene changed to young men from the villages happily marching to World War1 through fields of poppies while the women protested for the right to vote. This was really the end of the first act.
The second act centred around the formation of the National Health Service (NHS) at the end of the second world war featuring the swing tunes of the 1940's. As the cast featured staff and patients at the actual Great Ormond Streat Hospital for children (GOSH) which Peter Pan writer J.M. Barrie bequeathed the proceeds of said book to the management thought the sequence about the monsters attacking the patients was about the hard work doctors do to calm scared children. Although the NHS wasn't formed until 1946 we did have hospitals in Britain before then. Those hospitals were entirely private enterprises which charged patients for their care and relied heavily on charitable donations such as the donation J.M Barrie made to GOSH. When the NHS was formed many of these private hospitals closed down but others such as GOSH and the Royal London in Whitechapel - close to the Olympic park - were absorbed into the NHS. As raising money to help sick children is an easy sell GOSH has more or less continued as a private hospital that sometimes treats NHS patients - an early example of a public private partnership. Therefore the sequence with the medics from GOSH protecting the sick children from the monsters was actually an attempt to generate support amongst the British public for the NHS reforms which will see all British hospitals follow the GOSH model. As such the sequence was intended to show how much better the medics are at GOSH.
The third act covered everything that happened from the 1950's right up to the present day and explored everything that was wrong with modern society through a random and not strictly speaking linear selection of British pop hits. This was also designed to introduce you to Stratford and east London's multi-culturalism. Cited examples of what was wrong with modern society included technology, immigrants, paedophilia and the consensual sexualisation of children with other children - something that was blamed on the blacks. A major theme was warning the middle class parents of the area about keeping an eye on their children's house parties and or sex lives. During the course of the Olympics I think the paedophilia bit counts as a valid warning because we've got high level delegations from the Gulf Monarchies in and even by Islamic standards they can get a bit rapey. The sequence in which the young black male (an example of a dangerous dog) "found" the young black female's (an example of a dangerous bitch) phone could have been reference to a number of incidents in London gang culture in which young women have invited young men round for sex in order to lure them into their own murders. Primarily though it was a warning to Olympic visitors that Stratford can get a bit stabby. However as with any major global city as long as you aren't wandering around showing off expensive possessions such as iPhones, cameras etc whilst carrying a giant map that tells the world you're a tourist you probably won't get mugged. Of there is a much higher risk that you will be robbed by one of more most of the world's pickpockets. However with them you won't even noticed you're being robbed.
The fourth act was moment of silence to remember our fallen. Specifically this was a reference to the fact that the 2012 Olympics is the 40th anniversary of 11 Israeli athletes being killed at the 1972 Munich Olympics. Now whatever you think about the Jews this was indisputably the worst single loss of life that the Olympic family has suffered so I think it should have been marked. However since the death Muammer Qaddafi who allegedly funded the Black September terrorists who carried out the 1972 attack along with lots of other groups such as the Red Army Faction (RAF) in what was really the golden age of international terrorism and summed up rather well in the song "Tommy Gun" by " The Clash" dwelling on the Munich attacks directly would have been more distasteful then respectful. So instead Britain decided to present it as memorial to those who lost their lives in the Al Qaeda terrorist attacks that struck London on July 7th 2005 (7/7/05) - the day after London was awarded the 2012 Olympics. They did this by showing photographs of the dead on big screens while Scottish pop singer/micro-biology drop-out "Emile Sande" sang the hymn "Abide With Me" which is the hymn the British military have used to remember their dead since before WW1. Therefore it is musical shorthand for being prepared to die for the Monarch. Marking the Munich anniversary in this way was particularly provocative because Israel's now Prime Minister and then Finance Minister Benjamin Netanyahu narrowly avoided being caught up in the attacks following a warning from the Israeli Embassy. Although this only really demonstrates that the Israelis spend a lot of their time worrying about Islamic terrorism it has been used as "evidence" for a conspiracy theory that the 7/7 attacks were an Israeli false-flag attack. This point was driven home by the Pakistani/Arab Muslim dancers who performed on stage during the hymn. As "The Clash" are/were a really great British band and their lyrics may or may not form a code-base in discussions over Iran's nuclear program Britain would have loved to have had them perform at the opening ceremony. The only problem with that is the lead singer is now dead. So instead we got the lead singer of another famous British band "The Artic Monkeys" doing his best Joe Strummer impression in leather jacket and quiff during act 6 - the torch lighting ceremony.
Act 5 was the parade of nations which saw the teams enter the stadium beneath their national flag. Although the host nation gets to control things like the music that's played and what's happening in the background this is really a compulsory part of any Olympic opening ceremony and is generally the responsibility of the International Olympic Committee (IOC). This part of the ceremony is actually a significant part of how the IOC keep the Olympic myth going. Apart from the heart warming sight of amateur athletes clearly being over-excited by all the attention smaller and newer nations have long been told this is an opportunity to promote themselves on the world stage. Therefore there is always the risk of controversy as some nations may cross the line between making the rest of the world aware of their existence and ambush marketing. Recently Azerbaijan have been getting a reputation for this sort of thing. For example at the Euro2012 football tournament the Azerbaijani government spent a lot of money sending teams of representatives disguised as fans to make sure the Azerbaijani flag was prominently displayed during all of the matches. Although I actually spent the parade of nations trying to figure out how to react to the Critical Mass incident I gather the big controversy was a mystery woman who managed to join in with the Indian team. This was done by the host nation to promote discussion about the best ways to ensure that people who engage in ambush marketing are kept out of Olympic venues - a big part of protecting the branding of the Olympics. As to why they chose to pick on India in particular I'm not really sure.
Act 6 could be divided into two parts; the raising of the Olympic flag and the lighting of the Olympic cauldron. Although these are set events that the IOC demand must happen the local hosts are given almost total freedom in how they happen. One area the IOC had control over though was the selection of the eight flag bearers who carried the Olympic flag into the stadium. These were;
The show was closed by "Paul McCartney" performing the Beatles hit "Hey Jude." The idea of this was to calm everyone down as they prepared to leave and to remind the British TV viewers that it was very late at night (around 1AM) so they'd better be going to bed. Paul McCartney also performed Hey Jude at the Live 8 concert just days before Britain was awarded the 2012 Olympics back in 2005. It was around the 157th chorus that many people got the distinct impression that the Live 8 concert wasn't over-running by accident.
Like the games itself the opening ceremony was overwhelmed by war, nationalism and whoring. However I think the artistic director Danny Boyle coped well by setting out to tell the history of Britain from the start of the industrial revolution to the present day.
Taking a major historical liberty act 1 began with the start of the industrial revolution set at the start of the 1900's (20th Century). It started showing Britain's agricultural economy (our green and pleasant land) being ravaged by resource mining and the smoke stacks of industrial development. The key figure here was Kenneth Branagh playing Isambard Kingdom Brunel/generic 19th century industrialist. He recited lines from William Shakespeare's "The Tempest" which is a play about a man trapped on an island with a wizard who could control the weather. The management thought this would play well in African nations where witchcraft is still respected as a legitimate belief system. However what everybody in the cast, audience or anyone with at least some knowledge of science saw was a commentary about how the carbon dioxide released by burning coal causes climate change. A clear and only slightly justified swipe at China over climate change negotiations. Then suddenly the scene changed to young men from the villages happily marching to World War1 through fields of poppies while the women protested for the right to vote. This was really the end of the first act.
The second act centred around the formation of the National Health Service (NHS) at the end of the second world war featuring the swing tunes of the 1940's. As the cast featured staff and patients at the actual Great Ormond Streat Hospital for children (GOSH) which Peter Pan writer J.M. Barrie bequeathed the proceeds of said book to the management thought the sequence about the monsters attacking the patients was about the hard work doctors do to calm scared children. Although the NHS wasn't formed until 1946 we did have hospitals in Britain before then. Those hospitals were entirely private enterprises which charged patients for their care and relied heavily on charitable donations such as the donation J.M Barrie made to GOSH. When the NHS was formed many of these private hospitals closed down but others such as GOSH and the Royal London in Whitechapel - close to the Olympic park - were absorbed into the NHS. As raising money to help sick children is an easy sell GOSH has more or less continued as a private hospital that sometimes treats NHS patients - an early example of a public private partnership. Therefore the sequence with the medics from GOSH protecting the sick children from the monsters was actually an attempt to generate support amongst the British public for the NHS reforms which will see all British hospitals follow the GOSH model. As such the sequence was intended to show how much better the medics are at GOSH.
The third act covered everything that happened from the 1950's right up to the present day and explored everything that was wrong with modern society through a random and not strictly speaking linear selection of British pop hits. This was also designed to introduce you to Stratford and east London's multi-culturalism. Cited examples of what was wrong with modern society included technology, immigrants, paedophilia and the consensual sexualisation of children with other children - something that was blamed on the blacks. A major theme was warning the middle class parents of the area about keeping an eye on their children's house parties and or sex lives. During the course of the Olympics I think the paedophilia bit counts as a valid warning because we've got high level delegations from the Gulf Monarchies in and even by Islamic standards they can get a bit rapey. The sequence in which the young black male (an example of a dangerous dog) "found" the young black female's (an example of a dangerous bitch) phone could have been reference to a number of incidents in London gang culture in which young women have invited young men round for sex in order to lure them into their own murders. Primarily though it was a warning to Olympic visitors that Stratford can get a bit stabby. However as with any major global city as long as you aren't wandering around showing off expensive possessions such as iPhones, cameras etc whilst carrying a giant map that tells the world you're a tourist you probably won't get mugged. Of there is a much higher risk that you will be robbed by one of more most of the world's pickpockets. However with them you won't even noticed you're being robbed.
The fourth act was moment of silence to remember our fallen. Specifically this was a reference to the fact that the 2012 Olympics is the 40th anniversary of 11 Israeli athletes being killed at the 1972 Munich Olympics. Now whatever you think about the Jews this was indisputably the worst single loss of life that the Olympic family has suffered so I think it should have been marked. However since the death Muammer Qaddafi who allegedly funded the Black September terrorists who carried out the 1972 attack along with lots of other groups such as the Red Army Faction (RAF) in what was really the golden age of international terrorism and summed up rather well in the song "Tommy Gun" by " The Clash" dwelling on the Munich attacks directly would have been more distasteful then respectful. So instead Britain decided to present it as memorial to those who lost their lives in the Al Qaeda terrorist attacks that struck London on July 7th 2005 (7/7/05) - the day after London was awarded the 2012 Olympics. They did this by showing photographs of the dead on big screens while Scottish pop singer/micro-biology drop-out "Emile Sande" sang the hymn "Abide With Me" which is the hymn the British military have used to remember their dead since before WW1. Therefore it is musical shorthand for being prepared to die for the Monarch. Marking the Munich anniversary in this way was particularly provocative because Israel's now Prime Minister and then Finance Minister Benjamin Netanyahu narrowly avoided being caught up in the attacks following a warning from the Israeli Embassy. Although this only really demonstrates that the Israelis spend a lot of their time worrying about Islamic terrorism it has been used as "evidence" for a conspiracy theory that the 7/7 attacks were an Israeli false-flag attack. This point was driven home by the Pakistani/Arab Muslim dancers who performed on stage during the hymn. As "The Clash" are/were a really great British band and their lyrics may or may not form a code-base in discussions over Iran's nuclear program Britain would have loved to have had them perform at the opening ceremony. The only problem with that is the lead singer is now dead. So instead we got the lead singer of another famous British band "The Artic Monkeys" doing his best Joe Strummer impression in leather jacket and quiff during act 6 - the torch lighting ceremony.
Act 5 was the parade of nations which saw the teams enter the stadium beneath their national flag. Although the host nation gets to control things like the music that's played and what's happening in the background this is really a compulsory part of any Olympic opening ceremony and is generally the responsibility of the International Olympic Committee (IOC). This part of the ceremony is actually a significant part of how the IOC keep the Olympic myth going. Apart from the heart warming sight of amateur athletes clearly being over-excited by all the attention smaller and newer nations have long been told this is an opportunity to promote themselves on the world stage. Therefore there is always the risk of controversy as some nations may cross the line between making the rest of the world aware of their existence and ambush marketing. Recently Azerbaijan have been getting a reputation for this sort of thing. For example at the Euro2012 football tournament the Azerbaijani government spent a lot of money sending teams of representatives disguised as fans to make sure the Azerbaijani flag was prominently displayed during all of the matches. Although I actually spent the parade of nations trying to figure out how to react to the Critical Mass incident I gather the big controversy was a mystery woman who managed to join in with the Indian team. This was done by the host nation to promote discussion about the best ways to ensure that people who engage in ambush marketing are kept out of Olympic venues - a big part of protecting the branding of the Olympics. As to why they chose to pick on India in particular I'm not really sure.
Act 6 could be divided into two parts; the raising of the Olympic flag and the lighting of the Olympic cauldron. Although these are set events that the IOC demand must happen the local hosts are given almost total freedom in how they happen. One area the IOC had control over though was the selection of the eight flag bearers who carried the Olympic flag into the stadium. These were;
- Daniel Barenboim. An Argentine/Israeli pianist and classical music conductor who has been an active supporter of Palestinian rights and peace campaigner. Along with Palestinian academic Edward Said Barenboim formed the East-West Divan orchestra which brings young Israeli and Palestinian musicians together in an attempt to bring peace through understanding by bridging the cultural divide. Apart from showing the IOC's commitment to peace in the middle-east as an Argentinian and Israeli dual-national Barenboim's inclusion also seems to have been a reference the the bombing of an Israeli tourist bus in Bulgaria which occurred on the anniversary of the bombing of the Israeli Embassy in Argentina. Interestingly he also shares the same birthday as me.
- Sally Becker. A British charity worker who headed "Operation Angel" charity which rescued Muslim women and children from the town of Mostar during the Bosnian war. As Operation Angel is one those British charities no-one's ever heard of let alone donated money too, has an anti-Serb bias and was instrumental in highlighting the suffering of Kosovar civilians which lead to the 1999 NATO attack on Serbia Becker is seen as a British government agent. Therefore her inclusion was to draw attention to Britain's role in the Bosnian and Kosovan wars which has obvious links to the Ratko Mladic trial and the situations in Libya and Syria.
- Leymah Gbowee. The winner of the 2011 Nobel Peace Prize for her work in bringing an end to the second Liberian civil war Gbowee went on the spearhead the campaign to have former Liberian President Charles Taylor prosecuted under the slogan "Pray the Devil back to Hell" and campaigned for Ellen Johnson Sirleaf - Liberia and Africa's first female head of state. Therefore Gbowee's inclusion was to draw attention to women's rights in general and in Africa in particular. She also drew attention to Charles Taylor's recent conviction for war crimes committed during the civil war in Sierra Leone and possibly the difference between Tony Blair's and the Conservative British government which proceed his Labour government approaches to the conflict.
- Haile Gabrselassie. A legendary Ethiopian marathon runner who also won two Olympic gold medals in the 10,000 metres and set some 27 world records Gabrselassie was included because he is/was a great Olympian and ambassador for the Olympics. He is also an ambassador for Britain's "G4S 4teens" scheme designed to get British teenagers involved in sport. Obviously that program is sponsored by ill-fated London 2012 security firm G4S.
- Marina Silva. A Brazilian environmentalist who has won numerous awards for her work on environmental protection including being appointed a "UN Champion of the Earth" Silva is a member of the Brazilian Parliament representing the Green Party. As a political rival of Brazilian President Dilma Rousseff who attended the opening ceremony Ms Silva's inclusion caused some controversy in Brazil but I think she was included to represent the 2016 Olympic host Brazil and the environment rather then in a political capacity.
- Ban Ki-moon. As the Secretary General of the United Nations I think Mr Ban's inclusion is rather self-explanatory.
- Doreen Lawrence. The Jamaican born mother of murdered British teenager Stephen Lawrence Ms Lawrence was chosen to highlight the strong links between Britain and Caribbean islands such as Jamaica. It also seems to be a subtle little swipe at Britain's current Conservative government who were in power when Stephen Lawrence was killed and his murder covered up because it was the Labour government that launched an inquiry into the killing which eventually led to two of the killers being brought to justice. It was of course this Labour government that was in power when the IOC awarded Britain the 2012 games.
- Shami Chakriabarti. A British lawyer Ms Chakriabarti is also the head of the "Liberty" campaign group which campaigns for civil liberties, prisoners rights and the right to protest. Liberty have in the past represented groups such as Critical Mass and although I will need to check I think that Ms Chakriabarti might have personally represented Critical Mass in some of their many court cases. Her inclusion was to emphasise the Olympic's commitment to human rights. The arrest of 182 people (an Olympic record) at a Critical Mass during the Olympic opening ceremony was Britain's way of making Ms Chakribariti's appearance that little bit more nerve wracking and showing it's opposition to human rights
The show was closed by "Paul McCartney" performing the Beatles hit "Hey Jude." The idea of this was to calm everyone down as they prepared to leave and to remind the British TV viewers that it was very late at night (around 1AM) so they'd better be going to bed. Paul McCartney also performed Hey Jude at the Live 8 concert just days before Britain was awarded the 2012 Olympics back in 2005. It was around the 157th chorus that many people got the distinct impression that the Live 8 concert wasn't over-running by accident.